Death is closer than we think....

In the time of 2-3 weeks heard of 2 more diagnosed

Chris says only matter of time before we get it

Maharaj says if The Lord himself saves you, then you shall be saved

Mum house is so empty

It was Mum's time to go

We all have to go one day

We must prepare daily

Mum used yo say the house feels like a wedding house

When she was diagnosed

Made me think of Sohila Sahib

Like we split the preparation of a wedding into stages

Prepare a plan split by day

Budget

Decide on outfits

So much prep but in an instant the wedding comes and goes 

Maharaj how can I prepare for my death?

Stop thinking of mine and yours...

Missing Mum

By Claudia Lee

I awake each morning to start a new day

But the pain of losing you never goes away.

I go about the things I have to do 

And as the hours pass I think again of you.

I want to call you and just hear your voice

Then I remember that I have no choice

For you are not there and now my heart cries

Just to see you again to tell you goodbye

To say Mum I love you and I always will

And hope that much of you, in me you’ve instilled.

The day that you left I just didn’t know

That you were going where I couldn’t go.

And now all my memories of you are so dear

But gosh, how I miss you and wish you were here.

Who now can hear me when I need to cry?

It so hard to tell you “Mum goodbye.”

Someday I know all will be well

And I’ll see you again with stories to tell

Of how you were missed and how we have grown

And how good it is to finally be home.

Until then my memories of you I’ll keep near

And I’ll pass them on to those who are dear.

I miss you Mum,

Last time

I can still remember the last time we hugged, we kissed, that I lay next to you. It was the 22nd September just after 5pm. My eldest brother offered to take the little one to his house. So I cuddled up to Mum. 

Mum said "tu Aja mere naal pehja..." She held me close and said "Tera saachi viah hogia? Tu ta meri Nikki jehi pappi ah" Mum kissed me and held me close. 

Mum said little one will be ok with her mama Ji,don't worry. 

My mum used to say that I have such a little face and how I never looked married because I never wore make up or dressed any different to when I was single. She loved the fact I had my own key and came and went as I pleased. She said as long as the parents were alive a daughter can come and go as she wants. She treated me like a princess.  My mum was my world. My best friend. 

How could I worry when I was lying in heaven. 

I miss you so much, my tears pierce my heart. 

This is the picture my brother sent when I was with my Mum

Feeling weighed down

I feel weighed down

As of late I loose my balance

Like I miss my support

To stand up tall

I want to bury myself

Deep within the earth

In the hope I can steal a moment 

When can I talk to you?

My period is barely there

You worry if I will conceive

I say Maharaj's will

But I miss your worrying

You won't believe but I started my period

My mum told me before me

I was pregnant 

My mum told me before me

The pain of child birth

My mum told me before me

Never trust those that betrayed Guru Gobind Singh Ji

My mum told me 

You taught us to give to those less fortunate

And yet I could give nothing to you...

Why do I feel you/Maharaj are mad at me?

Need a hug from my Mum xx

Mum birthday

As each passing day goes by
A tear falls from my eye
With each day passing me
A memory comes to mind
Without you by my side
Tears and memories compile

My heart feels heavy as I have so much to say 

I hope Mum is at peace as I can only pray

Source: For A Mother's Birthday, Birthday Poem http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/for-a-mothers-birthday#ixzz2noIuFcVh 
Family Friend Poems 

I'm sorry Mum

London bound today

But usually excitement to see Mum

Overwhelms

Not today

Not had a dream about Mum for few days

What does that mean?

Is Mum upset with me?

I wish she was still here

Please don't be upset with me?

I'm sorry

She would have loved to see the little one in a suit

This ones for you Mum 

Spirit

One more Time

To see you, to feel you

You were so real in my dream

But you were a spirit

You said you wanted to be taken away

Just come and pick you up

Mum wanted to spend a day away

One more time 

I keep dreaming of Mum

But I don't know how to take these dreams

Blessed worried?

One more time

Mum soul may not rest until she sees her final wishes come true

Or am I just been biased? 

Unsure

Unsure of where to go

What to do 

What to see

How to do it

My Sikhi is in London

But sikhi is in my heart

I am not strong enough alone

I just wish I could run away

As far away as I can

Never to return 

To be one with Waheguru

If I want it so bad and yet no active steps

So much to consider

Especially life of the little One

It's not in my hands but I ask you to help me

Guide me

Feel so sad

So beyond my control